There’s men everywhere working on and challenging one another to be the best DAD they can be. There is a smaller movement of “guys” who are working on becoming the best MAN they can be.

How do you know you’re being a good dad, or a good man? ” You will know a tree by its fruit.” The fruit of Dadhood is the quality of life of your own children. What, then, is the fruit of Manhood? I believe it is the quality of life of everyone else you come into contact with. As a man, you should improve the lives of those around you, and that improvement should start with the ones cloises to you. Therefore, being a good MAN mean to love your wife.

-JB

-JB

This post comes rooted and inspired from a couple places: the counselor my wife and I saw when we were engaged, a couple arguments we’ve had over the years and how I acted in them, and the book I’m currently reading (Healing the Masculine Soul).  

Like good sex, a good argument means that a husband is finally active, involved and engaged with his wife.  It is tangible proof that he can be strong. In the midst of battle, he is no longer a wet noodle.

This passage from The book tells you what your woman is looking for, and why she pokes and prods at your emotional triggers trying to get you to engage her in a fight. Like a hungry warrior looking for a fight, she wants to entice any battle that will prove her worthiness… She wants to know you think she is worth the engagement.  

I made this mistake once (that I can remember ), I “needed” to get some sleep and didn’t want to start an argument, so I walked out of the room and slept somewhere else.  What I didn’t know, is that the argument had been going on way before I knew about it.  My wife later told me (after we talked it out) that walking away made her feel as if she was not worth the time and effort to work through the issue… that her feelings were not important enough to talk about.

We men are more often geared for content and solutions than process and relationships; the woman is often less concerned with what she’s fighting about than with whom she’s fighting.